Ready... Set...

Roadblock.

Okay, so I have a few months off of school and I'm supposed to have more time to write, right? Well not really. But I'm going to MAKE time, GDI, even if I have to pull an hour of sleep from my tired self. There is a weency problem, though.

What do I write about?

I'm supposed to be the one that answers that question. I know this. But I don't know what I'd want to write about that will hold my interest for 80-100k words, and I don't currently have any characters that are trying to beat their way outta my head. I spent three years with werewolves on the brain so I'd rather not repeat that, however it seems any time I think about writing my brain goes straight to my Kate story. I've decided it means I'm not done with it. It needs more love. I'm not ready to put more emotional effort into it, though. It's exhausting being in Kate's head and I'm frustrated with that story beyond belief. I need something fresh to work with.

So, werewolves are out. I'm not doing vampires because the market is saturated right now and even I'm getting a little tired of them (half the time I can't even take them seriously anymore. Thanks a lot, Meyer). I don't want to do demons as they don't hold my interest beyond an occasional read. Other shifters I'm sort of lumping in with werewolves. So in one fell swoop there goes the majority of the urban fantasy genre, and what's left for me to work with? Magic users. Meh. Guardians. Meh. (Although I have to say my Nasaru story from NaNo 07 was friggin' hilarious.)

Let's skip the creature feathers. Features. WTF with the Freudian slip? Been playing WoW for too long (I'm a Balance druid, which in form looks like an owlbear that can go pew pew. Go go laser turkey!). I do also have old stories with feathered hotnesses, but like I said, shifters are out for me right now, and anyway some other really awesome author I know is coming out with her first two books that involve feathery hotness, and I don't want to hitch a ride on her bandwagon just yet.

ANYWAY. Enough with the sidetracks. So if I'm skipping the thought of creature features for now, I suppose I better just find a character personality that suits me and write about him/her to see what hits the page. Don't think I've written anything in a dude's point of view yet so maybe I'll try that. Of course he'd have to be a complete asshole because goody-two-shoes aren't that fun to write about (to me)(unless they suddenly become bad guys which is kind of cliche).

A dude, then. I'll work with that. Let me roll that one around for the day and see if I can come up with an appropriately asshole-ish name.


~Sass~

Cold Fire

Cold Fire by Dean Koontz

I thought I saw the ending to this one coming from a mile away (and actually groaned aloud like "really, koontz? really?"), but thank God I was Wrong with a capital W. I never really got into Dean Koontz before because I started with a different story of his that I just didn't like. Nothing wrong with his writing in the other book, I just didn't like the story. Kind of like I don't do chick flicks (but love romance novels... figure that one out). There's nothing inherently wrong with chick flicks. I just don't tend to enjoy them as much as other types of movies. It was the same with the first book I read of Koontz's -- just didn't dig the story.

This book, however, hooked me. I *love* the dialogue. Not a lot of male fiction authors get that dialogue thing down to a point where I'm smirking as I read (which is why a lot of female authors adorn my shelves) but Koontz did it in this book. And I'm beginning to see the buzz about his ability to sustain suspense. He had me turning pages to a point where I blinked and went woah, hold on, that one event was like 80 pages? No way! This thing hit me like the multi-genre force of nature it really was. I finished the book and I shit you not my first thought was "okay when are they making the movie?" Lo and behold, the afterword had a blurb about that which was FRIGGIN HILARIOUS. (((this is the start of the spoilery part that I'm going to put in black text so you don't read it by accident)))

Turns out they have a script ready to go, they're just waiting on the right person to get the movie going. He's held up because ((SPOILERY SPOILER ALERT)) all the directors keep telling him "but what if there really WERE aliens in the well?" to which I was mentally shouting BE GONE DEMON HOLLYWOOD PERSON. GET THEE TO THE NEAREST PIT OF FIRE. Mostly because that was what made me groan about the book in the first place. Aliens, Koontz? Really? Are we really going there? But no, it was not aliens, and the Sass was pleased. The people rejoiced. And some fifteen years later there is still no movie because all the directors have the same "original" idea to actually put aliens in a story where there are none. Good job, Hollywood people. Way to be original.

Maybe Koontz should send his stuff to JJ Abrams. I bet JJ wouldn't frigging stick aliens in a story where there are none.

Anyways, peace out. Buy yourself this book and have at it. It's a good read.


~Sass~

Swine Flu - Preventative Measures

Don't do this.



That is all.



~Sass~

Denial Is A River In Egypt

My husband found this one earlier:

I'm concerned that my son has a secret girlfriend?
(posted approx 4 months ago)

My 17 year old son has been very secretive with me lately, recently he has started to refuse to go to church with the family and tonight when I was going through his room I found a magazine with naked men in it. He obviously has a girlfriend that he is hiding from me that brought that magazine into my home and I am afraid they are having intercourse and I am greatly concerned that he is going to get her pregnant.

What should I do about this?

Additional Details
He is not a homosexual, we have taught him from the bible and he has learned though our church that this is not in God's plan. I will not teach him about condoms, that is unacceptable, we have always taught him about abstinence and that is what God and his future wife expects from him.

I want to speak to our pastor about this but I am very afraid of what he would think we are teaching our son if he things we are allowing him to sneak a girl into his bedroom. That is clearly inappropriate and we are good parents, I am very afraid what he will think of us.

Hilarity ensues.




~Sass~

Manscaping

I LOL'd this morning when one of the radio morning show peeps started talking about "manscaping"... I guess his wife wanted a guinea pig for waxing purposes and they volunteered the other morning show guy. It's common these days for men to do more traditional girly stuff like waxing, but I hadn't heard that term before. Manscaping. LOL. Had to share :)


Speaking of, my husband recently turned down an offer to do a little waxing himself. He'd probably be embarrassed for me to talk about it but that makes it more fun right? (Love you, sweety!) Basically, my hubby is a big ol' sack of testosterone -- dude's got some serious hair like everywhere. Sort of like a blond Robin Williams. Or David Hasslehoff.

...Okay maybe not quite that bad, but he's pretty hairy. Anyway our roommate almost talked him into waxing his back but he backed down last minute because he didn't feel it was worth $40. *I* feel it's worth $40. He gets so friggin' itchy all the time with all that hair. Somehow, some way, he will be talked into "manscaping."

In other news, I finally bought some bookcases. I thought maybe two of the five-shelf bookcases would be sufficient, but alas... that only got me through the letter L (I was going alphabetical). We went out and bought a third five-shelf bookcase and the rest of the books fit perfectly. There's wiggle room on each shelf for the inevitable additions, plus I made a list of books I was missing as I put stuff away, so there's room for the missing books, too. I'm missing about 10 that I know of, and that's only because they were parts of series. There could be some missing singles but of course I won't realize that until I want to read it and go "now wait a minute, where is that book? I know I have it here somewhere..."

Also got a good workout yesterday while we were cleaning out the garage. Today is free large item pickup day, so we dragged everything and the kitchen sink out to the sidewalk to be picked up. Lotta garage stuff -- "workbenches" that were old kitchen cabinets with old doors on the top that functioned as "desk" space, an old lawnmower that crapped out, the shower we tore out of the lower level bathroom, miscellaneous pieces of wood, couple of tree branches, etc. It was a pretty impressive pile. And now our garage can maybe accommodate (gasp!) a second car. Scandalous, I tell you. Just scandalous.

Anyway I need to get to work. TTFN!


Today's nostalgic "Good Idea, Bad Idea":

Good Idea: Taking a deep breath before jumping into a swimming pool.
Bad Idea: Taking a deep breath after jumping into a swimming pool.


~Sass~

Goals, I Has Dems

Heh. Okay, that was a much longer delay than I really wanted between posts. Something about distractions and lack of internet for an entire evening... anyway, as promised, I'm trying to post on a regular basis again!

Today's "hmm" moment: for the first time since January I'm reading a new book. This may not seem like the triumph of a century, but after cutting "unnecessary" things from my budget (which includes trips to the bookstore) I've been stuck either re-reading whatever I could get a hold of (not much when all my books are packed in the basement still), or going without. Mostly going without due to school work. And this really shouldn't surprise me anymore, but I feel so much more relaxed when I can read for entertainment. I'm able to forget the rest of the world for a few hours and bury myself in imagination. This strengthens my resolve to read the 30+ books this year.

So let's see... what goals can I give myself for April? And May. Probably need to think about that one ahead of time too. I did so well with the Jan/Feb goals that I want to keep doing it. Any suggestions?


~Sass~

I'M BACK. No, really!

This ain't no April Fools joke, kids. The Bioche is back! School is no longer kicking my ass quite as hard as it was and I am slowly finding time in my schedule to do things like... well, blog. Or, you know, breathe. And sleep.

But hey -- great news!

As of Feb 27th we have... A SADIE. What is a Sadie? you ask. She's a sweet 65lb 1 yr and 8 mo old Shepherd-Collie mix is what she is! The cuteness is unbelievable. We adopted her from the Boulder Humane Society because we're just good people like that. No pictures yet though because I'm a slacktard, but I promise I'll try to get some loaded for you guys to "awww!" at soon. There is one pic on my husband's Facebook for those of you that happen to have him friended, but out of my usual reader base (you know, all 20 of you that used to come here) I think only one of you even has me on Facebook. Anyway, you shall have pictures. Check back in a few to see if I've added any. (u like wot I did thar? hee!)

Also have to send a shout out to Kelly Meding -- you are rocking that new book cover! Let me know when I can spill and post a pic on here. Also, everyone else should put Three Days to Dead on their to-read list when it comes out in October. DO IT. Do it or I shall show up at your house and eyeball you a lot. Like this. (Yes, that is me. Yes, I realize I have the frizzy hair of doom.)

Dang. I haven't done this in so long I've lost my flow. I was logging in here to come make a post of awesome and joy, however I think I'll leave you guys with this brief update and try again tomorrow morning. Oh! Wait, that was it. I forgot to tell you guys... my nightowlness is shifting itself to be severe early morning instead of "late night." I've found if I hit the sack at 9:30 (that's early for the person that usually goes to bed between 11 and midnight) then I can get up at 4am and have some serious concentration time. I love it. Two hours to myself without anyone else being awake, it's still dark so I still feel like it's middle of the night, and I'm not brain fried from being at work all day. The state of mind at that time in the morning is fantastical. It's just... wow. I wish I had converted sooner. I may have even found a new time to try and pound out a few thousand words on that new stuff I promised I'd write this year.

So, I shall leave you with my goal updates and be back tomorrow. Stay tuned! And if you need an update before that because you just can't wait, you can always check Twitter. Or seek professional help. Whichever works for you!


~*GOAL UPDATES*~

Long-term Stuff:
-- Make healthier eating choices. Considering what we spend on food we're not doing too badly. If we were spending the extra money we could be eating uber healthy, but right now we're kind of doing the budget thing, so yeah.
-- Plan / outline / brainstorm at least one complete novel. Slackerific the Slacktastic Slackness, that's my name now. To my credit though I've been hella busy with school and things so it's not entirely my fault. Right? Am I right?
-- Write said planned novel in three months. Pending previous goal.
-- Be active at least three days out of the week. Well, due to the new addition (Sadie!) we've been out walking at least once a day. This one is going strong and showing no signs of stopping!
-- Stick to the budget. We're actually doing so well on this one that my husband now bitterly calls us misers. Sir Spend A Lot is making more adjustment than he wants to, I think. Meanwhile I'm all proud of myself for living like the stereotypical writer ^_^
-- Find a second renter. Bit the bullet and joined Roommates.com. It's only been one day so far so I'm trying not to be too eager to get responses, but damn, every time I get those silly "you have another match!" emails I get all excited thinking it's someone that emailed me.
-- Finish one of two bathrooms. Got ourselves a curved double rod for the upstairs bathroom and are now using it. This is because we had to tear out the downstairs bathroom due to an un-reparable leak in the base... and now we get to rebuild it. Woo.
-- Take a two week vacation. Still don't know what to do with my remaining vacation. Pondering a drive back to KC to see the folks. Yes, I did just use that word. I am not old fashioned, I swear... I'm just from the midwest. kthx.
-- Read 30 books. I read Kelly Meding's As Lie The Dead and Carla Harker's Lethal Lies. Since then I've also devoured Scott Westerfield's Uglies and Pretties, with his other two on my to-read list. That's um... not much of an improvement since January. But, I am currently reading Kim Harrison's The Good, The Bad, and The Undead. That will be 5 down, 25 to go... I've got time!

Short-Term Stuff:
I got nothin. Any suggestions? Maybe I'll make a list tomorrow during my lunch break.



Today's nostalgic "Good Idea, Bad Idea":

Good Idea: Tossing a penny into the fountain to make a wish.
Bad Idea: Tossing your cousin Penny into the fountain to make a wish.


~Sass~